You’ll probably run into many people throughout the course of your dating preparations that could be The One, but you’ll never know for sure unless you talk to them. Starting a conversation with a stranger can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be impossible.

Every conversation runs its course within a similar outline: making first contact, introductions, speaking with each other, and then ending the conversation - hopefully with plans to meet again. To navigate these sometimes scary but usually rewarding waters, read on.

Ice Breakers as Conversation Starters

The purpose of breaking the ice with someone new isn’t to show off your amazing conversational skills. Instead, think of your initial contact as a way to show a potential date that you’d like to talk to them. Some conversation starter ideas to get the words flowing:

* Comment on an item that you both share in your immediate surroundings, such as the long lineup you’re both waiting in or the wobbly chair next to you. By focusing an item you can both experience, you’re removing any potential awkwardness with a canned comment.

* Sometimes a look is all that’s needed to break the ice. When faced with a person you find attractive, why not give them a genuine, 3 second smile? You may be surprised when the object of your happiness starts a conversation with you, instead.

* If there is something the person is or has that truly intrigues you, simply use that as a conversation starter. This could be as simple as admiring a piece of clothing or asking them about the item they ordered.

* A genuine hello coupled with a smile can be equally as effective. A quick, “How are you today?” works too for a straightforward follow up.

Conversation Topics

You’ve made first contact – now what? Conversation starters that seem witty or interesting can be a challenge in the spur of the moment. That’s why spending a little bit of time at home pondering the ‘now what’ will pay, later. You don’t need to invest hours into these conversation starters though. Some quick ideas that can work in a pinch:

* Current event topics of interest to you;

* The last movie you watched;

* A comment about the event you’re attending, with a follow-up question asking how they heard about it.

The point of this exercise is to create a backup of topics that you can draw upon on a moment’s notice to start a conversation that would also be of interest to someone else.

Keep the Conversation Moving Forward

Once the back and forth exchange has begun, it is your responsibility to keep the flow moving – which entails listening, responding and moving seamlessly between topics to create a connection.

For example: say the object of your affections intimated that they came to this particular coffee shop because a friend told them there was free WiFi access and they were excited to try the service out. A great segue to keep this conversation moving forward would be to ask where else they’ve found a good WiFi connection in town. For those not familiar with WiFi, you could ask what WiFi is and how it works.

In a nutshell, listen to what the person responds with and then think to yourself, “What do I know about those particular subjects?” Using the example again, you could easily discuss a myriad of things, such as where electrical plug-ins are located, the best place to sit while working on a laptop, or further inquiries about what kind of work they perform on their laptop.

Focus on taking your own experiences and weaving them in with the other person’s responses. By doing so you’ll be forging a connection with the person, creating hooks of information with which to start a conversation at a later date. To ensure that you are actually conversing, and not just bantering back and forth in a quick succession of questions and answers, try to remember these key points:

* Keep whatever stories or experiences you are sharing to less than a two minute retelling. You can always expand more if the person asks;
* Turn the conversation back to the other person where you can, such as, “What do you think?” or, “How about you?”;
* Try to let your conversation partner do half of the talking, with a natural blend of questions and answers;
* Don’t focus on one topic for too long, and if your talk gravitates to another subject - let it.

Ending a Conversation Gracefully

Every fantastic conversation must eventually finish, so let the conversation you started go gracefully and with style. Don’t provide too much information or go on for half an hour about your common interests. You may feel obligated to continue forward, but why not leave on a great note with your companion wanting more?

Thank the other person for their time and let them know you’ve got something else to do, but you’d like to continue the conversation another time when it’s convenient for the both of you. Using the WiFi situation as an example, you could say, “I’m going to be late for a meeting, but I’d really like to check out the restaurant you mentioned. Perhaps we could continue this conversation there together later on in the week? What do you think?”

After you’ve exchanged contact information, smile and go off to do whatever it is that you’ve moved on to. Make sure to look back just as you are leaving to smile again, acknowledging your newfound acquaintance and allowing them to feel just as special as you do for having met someone new.

在日常生活中，你可能会偶尔遇见一些人。而这些人，如果不同他们说话也许一直都不了解。如果觉得同陌生人说话，有点害羞，那是没有必要的。

基本上，所有的交谈都有类似模式。初次接触，介绍，互相交流，在期待中结束此次交谈。为了愉悦的掌握一些技巧，继续往下看。

做一个打破僵局的交谈者

打破僵局不是要你显示自己出色的交谈技巧，而是为了继续交谈而做的努力。下面是一些常用的话语：

关于你们共同所处的环境，比如排队等待，摇晃的座椅等。话题最好集中在你们共同经历的，你即将离开的不快，不痛不痒的评论。

有时候，一个注视也能很好的打破僵局。当你看到一个有吸引力的人，为什么不给他（她）一个3秒钟的友好微笑呢？你会惊奇的发现，交谈的快乐就源于此。

如果有人或事确实激起你的好奇心，这也可作为交谈的开始。就像一件衣服吸引你，叫别人领取他们点的单一样简单。

带着微笑的问好也同样非常有效。简单的你好也同样可以很好继续交谈下去。

交流话题

你已经初次接触了，接下来呢？可以从大家比较感兴趣的话题开始。这就是为什么很多人都在家花点时间来考虑该怎么进行。但是，你没必要花太多时间在这上面。如果需要，一些简单的话题也有作用：

时下的感兴趣话题、事情；

你上次看的电影；

关于你正在参与的事情，询问他们对此的看法。

这项练习的重点在于你能拉出一串你感兴趣而同事别人也感兴趣的话题。

继续话题

当一来一回后，你就有必要将话题延续了—包括倾听，响应，准确无误的继续话题。

举个例子。你很好的朋友一同来到咖啡屋，因为有一朋友告诉他有WiFi并且他们已经试过服务了。一个很好的继续就是询问他们城里哪有好的免费WiFi？而对那些不大熟悉WiFi的时候，你可以询问它是什么及如何工作的。

其实很简单，你只要认真倾听对方说什么以及如何反应的，再自己反问“在这个领域，我了解些什么？”这样，你很容易就能够讨论很多事情，比如电脑插件程序一般在哪，用笔记本工作的最好去处，更或是问问他们一般用笔记本来做什么工作。

侧重于你自己的经历并能征得别人的看法。这样你就能很好的融入到其中，并为以后的继续提供了信息。为确保你是在交谈而不是问答，最好能够记住这样一些要点：

利用2分钟时间来复述你所要分享的故事或者经历。如果有人提问你能够扩展开来；

在适当的时候回问对方，比如“对此，你怎么看呢？”“你怎么样？”

尽量在自然的问答间，保持对方交谈的量不少于一半；

不要在同一话题上耗时太长，如果不注意把话题转到其他方面，没关系，就这样。

结束美好的交谈

任何一个美妙的交谈都有结束的时候，所以让你的谈话在美妙种结束。不要一口气说太多或者在双方兴趣点上耗时太多。你可能很想继续，但为什么不留下让对方期待的东西呢？

当别人给你的时间并让你知道你还有其他事情可做时候，该谢谢他们，而你却想另找时间继续这个话题。就纳WiFi位置的事情打比方，有可以说“我有个会议要开，现在要迟到了。但我很想知道你们说的餐厅具体位置在哪，可不可以晚点找个时间再一起说说？你们看呢？”

当你们互换联系方式后，暂时停止并微笑着离开。这样，当回想起来时候仍记得你的微笑，感觉与认识一个特别的你。