There seems to be much violence in our world today that comes from intolerance, from people who are unable or unwilling to seek compromise with the other side. I feel this reaction is the result of the inability to feel compassion and empathy for others. Although most of us have little control over this arena in world events, we can influence the compassion experienced and communicated in our day-to-day life.

    Friends, it takes a lot of strength to be compassionate, especially when you are up against harshness, cruelty, anger and fear. Some mistake the act of being compassionate as a sign of weakness. Others may feel that compassion means giving up everything for someone else, or simply helping people out in times of need such as a natural disaster. While giving to others and extending a helping hand in dire situations are indeed examples of being compassionate, there are other ways.

    Acting with compassion can also mean being patient and responding in a nonaggressive way, even when you are being provoked. For example, friend, has someone ever struck out at you for no apparent reason, leaving you hurt, angry and confused by such behavior? Most likely, your initial reaction was to strike back, but if you were able to distance yourself from the experience and not take it personally, you may have had a different reaction.

    What if the difficult behavior you experienced actually had nothing to do with you? You may just have happened to cross paths with someone who was in a bad mood for reasons unknown to you. Taking such mitigating factors into consideration could make all the difference in the quality of your communication.

    This type of communication is called nonviolent communication, and it's about emphasizing compassion rather than negative feelings such as fear, guilt, shame, blame, coercion, threat, or justification for punishment. When we focus on clarifying what we observe, feel, need, and want, rather than on diagnosing and judging, we can discover our own compassion. We end up practicing a kind of deep listening to ourselves as well as others. If we are able to look at other people and ourselves with this wider heart, we can begin to change the quality of our communications. This action will affect others as well as ourselves in a positive way.

    What I am suggesting, friends, is no easy task, but perhaps it can give you some perspective and hope for dealing with the anger and aggression in a world that feels out of control. Once we find peace within ourselves, we will find it around us.

    似乎在我们的世界发生许多的暴力事件，因为不能容忍，不能或不愿寻求与对方妥协的人。我觉得这种反作用是无法感受同情和对他人怜悯的结果。尽管我们大多数人难以控制世界事件的角斗场，但我们可以影响我们在日常生活中经历和沟通的同情。

    朋友们，这需要更多的力量是富有同情心 ,特别是当你对付严酷，残暴，愤怒和恐惧。有些人错误的把富有同情心的行为看成是一种软弱的标志。另外一些人可能觉得同情心意味着为某些人放弃所有，或者简单的在人们需要时简单的帮助他们，如自然灾害。虽然给与别人和在可怕的情况时伸出救助之手确实是富有同情心的例子，但还有其他的方法。

    同情的表现也可意味着耐心的，甚至当你被挑衅的时候，你以一种不被侵犯的方式回应。比如，朋友，有没有人一直无缘由的冒犯你，让你受伤，生气并为这些行为困惑？最有可能的是，你最初的反应是回击，但是如果你能把自己从这些经历中远离开来并不把它揽在自己身上，你可能就会有不同的反应。

    如果你遇到困难的行为而实际上与你无关呢？你也许刚好和某个你不知道什么原因使他心情不好的人交叉穿过道路。考虑到可以让所有不同的在你的沟通质量差的缓解因素。

    这种类型的交流被称为非暴力头痛，它更多的是强调同情心，而非消极情绪，比如恐惧，内疚，羞愧，责备，胁迫，威胁，或者惩辩。当我们侧重于澄清我们的观察，感受，需求和希望，而不是诊断和判断，我们就会发现自己的同情心。最终我们奉行一种深听自己和他人。如果我们用这颗宽广的心曲看待人们和自己，我们就开始改变了我们的交流质量。这种反应将会以以后总积极的方式影响他人和我们自己。

    朋友们，我的建议就是，没有容易的任务，但是很可能它会给你一些处理世界上超出我们控制范围的愤怒和侵犯的期望和希望。一旦我们发现自己内心的和平，我们就会发现它就在我们身边。