Just mention two words: “Online Predator” to a parent and be prepared for a full-blown panic attack. Few things are more terrifying than envisioning our kids being recruited for sexual relationships -- and to top it off by some force we cannot even see. Though we can't ever fully protect our kids, this week a study was released that gives parents the critical information that just may help us stop the unthinkable.

The study was conducted by the Crimes Against Children Research Center at the University of New Hampshire. The researchers extensively interviewed 3,000 kids 10 to 17 years old who are Internet users as well as 612 federal, state and local law enforcement officials. The data was analyzed uncovering surprising data that every parent needs to know.

Biggest surprise: These sexual offenders shatter the online-predator mold. For the most part they are not molesters who use deception to assault our kids but instead they target children who are more vulnerable. (Reread that last line carefully. It provides insightful information). Though no child is one hundred percent safe, some children are far more at risk—and ones we need to keep a closer eye on.

Here are some of the highlights from the study and a few recommendations to take a more preventative approach to stopping this horrific crime:

The most vulnerable youth to online predators are those with lower-self esteem. Those predators specifically prey on kids who lack strong identity or have a weaker social network of their own. Those youth most at risk:

Have past histories of sexual or physical abuse

Engage in patterns of risky off- or online behavior

Frequent chatrooms:

-- talk online about sex

-- diverge personal information online

Do not have strong, healthy relationships with their parents

Are boys who are gay or questioning their sexual orientations

The predator looks for kids already vulnerable and then entices them by offering a romantic relationship. At the beginning stage the child sees this online stranger as someone reaching out as a friend and a person the child wants to get to know. The child views the overture as someone offering an adventure (exactly what risk-takers relish) or love (the very thing the child may be missing in his or her own life).

Using those social networks like Facebook or MySpace does not make kids more susceptible to online predators. What does increase a child’s danger: Frequenting chatrooms, giving out personal information and talking online to unknown people about sex.

Here are a few take away points from this important research:

Talk, talk, talk to your child about healthy relationships vs. unhealthy relationships. Then talk again. Kids need to understand the difference between those two.

Watch out for those chatrooms. Tell your child that if you ever walk by that computer and see him cover up that screen, the computer plug will be pulled and he loses the privilege. End of argument.

Set up clear rules about that computer. Here are a few essentials: Your computer must be in a central place where you can touch it at all times. Your child should never, ever give any personal information including name, address, phone number, password, school name, birthdate, town, etc.
Parents, get savvier about that computer. Know how to put up filters and blocks and how to know which sites your child has been frequenting. If you don’t know, sign up for a course or start doing your own Google searches. Stay one step ahead of your child!

Nurture your child's self-esteem and identity. Watch out if your child is having emotional difficulties. And seek the help of a mental health professional. Don't wait. Please. I've written a number of blogs about this one, and it continues to come up as a red flag.

Do know that the more involved you are in your child’s life, the less likely (according to this research) your child will be victimized. These are scarier times to be raising kids, but if we stay a bit more computer savvy, set clear rules about that computer, and more involved in our kids lives we can reduce the online predator risk and our panic attacks.

All the best for you and your family!  

就对父母说四个字：“网络猎人”，您要做好准备去经受一场重大恐慌事件。 想想我们的孩子要是被色情毒害，很可怕吧？但是有些事情比这更可怕，然后又悄无声息地结束。尽管我们以前没能百分百保护好我们的孩子，这周公布的一个研究却给了我们一些关键的信息，也许它能帮助我们去阻止不堪想象的事情。

这项研究由新罕普什尔大学的青少年犯罪研究中心进行的。研究人员大范围采访了3000个孩子，他们都是因特网用户，年龄从10-17岁不等，还有612位联邦，州级或地方的法律工作人员。研究数据表明的信息资料很令人吃惊，每个父母都有必要了解。

最令人感到意外的是：这些色情罪犯打破了网上捕猎者的模式，因为在很大程度上，他们并不是用诡计去毒害我们孩子的性骚扰者，相反，他们选那些比较弱小，比较容易受伤的孩子作为目标。（再好好读一遍最后一句话，那里有比较深层次的信息。）虽然没有一个孩子是百分百安全的，但是有些孩子却真的处于高危险中----他们也是我们需要关注的孩子。

以下是从研究中提取的的一些重点信息，还有一些对于可怕的罪行，我们该如何采取更有效的预防措施的推荐

在网络捕猎者的眼中，最容易下手的就是那些自尊心比较弱的孩子。捕猎者尤其喜欢对自尊心差或者自己交际网狭窄的孩子下手。这样的孩子大多数都处于危险之中：

·受过性虐待和身体虐待
·从事网上、网下各种形式的危险行为（活动）
·经常窜入聊天室：
----网聊有关性的话题
-- --在网上公布个人信息
·和父母的关系不够亲密，牢固
·有同性恋倾向或对自己性取向不明确的男生

捕猎者寻找那些本身就很脆弱的孩子，然后给他们提供一段很浪漫的关系。在开始的时候，孩子们把这位网上的陌生人看作是一个潜在的朋友，一个孩子想要结识的人物。孩子们以为这个人可以给他们带来奇遇（这恰恰是处于风险中的人的想法）或爱（这正是孩子们在他或她一生中可能错过的东西）。

社会性网络，如Facebook或MySpace的使用不没有增加孩子们被网络肉食者捕猎的风险，而是经常做客聊天室，发布个人信息以及和陌生人谈论有关性的话题时的孩子的危险系数增大。

以下是一些从这个重要的研究中提取的一些观点：

交流, 交流！和你的孩子多交流一些关于健康的和不健康的关系.然后还是交流。孩子们需要理解而这的区别。

小心那些聊天室。告诉你的孩子，你经过他的电脑旁的时候，如果他遮盖屏幕的话，你就会拔掉电脑插头，剥夺他的特权。不过这样常常以争吵而告终。

对电脑的似乎用要明确地约法三章。以下是一些要点： 你的电脑必要放在中央位置，以便你随时都可以用。你的孩子绝对不可以公布任何私人信息，包括姓名，地址，电话号码，密码，学校名称，生日，所在城市等等。

父母，要对电脑有足够悟性：要知道如何给你的孩子安装“筛子”和阻碍，要知道如何去获知你孩子经常访问的网站。如果你不知道，就去报个学习班或者着手于自己的google搜索引擎。一定要走在孩子的前沿！

塑造你孩子的自尊心和对自我的认识。如果你的孩子情感上有问题，那你可要注意了。. 向专业的心理医生求助。千万别无谓地等待！关于这个，我在博客里已经写了很多文章了，但它依然还是一个值得关注的问题。

你知道吗？据调查，你融入孩子的生活越多，你的孩子受害的风险就越小。.现在养孩子的不易时期，总让人提心吊胆。但是如果你对电脑的敏感度高一点，对电脑使用的规定明确一点，融入孩子的生活多一点，网络捕猎者和恐慌时间就会少一点。