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如何像婴儿般快乐:登上没有抱怨的开心之旅吧!

放大字体  缩小字体 发布日期:2009-07-17
核心提示:If we really want to be happy, why do we act like such babies? We can claim to be proactive in our life by settings goals and going after what we want. But if we're always whining and complaining all the time, are we really living effectively? If yo

    If we really want to be happy, why do we act like such babies?

    We can claim to be proactive in our life by settings goals and going after what we want. But if we're always whining and complaining all the time, are we really living effectively?

    If you don't believe me, count how many times you complain about something or other in one day. Whether it be being stuck in traffic, being bothered by the weather, not enough mustard on your sandwich, or whatever it is, there are endless instances where you can find a reason to complain.

    But it's not just outside circumstances that we complain about. We complain about about ourselves too. We complain that we don't have enough time, we don't have enough money (this one is huge because it's often "true"), that we're not smart enough, cool enough, or just enough.

    I know I've experienced plenty of unpleasantness due to complaining about things I can't control. I never really thought about it much until I found this website about "living in a complain free world."

    Imagine how much happier you would be if you simply stopped complaining? Much of what you complain about is outside of your control anyway. What's the point of brooding about something you have no power to change? Not very intelligent, if you ask me.

    Simply becoming conscious of how much you complain is the first step to stopping. When you recognize that you're complaining, stop and take notice of it. Ask yourself if you would rather complain, or be happy.

    Are you ready to live a complaint-free, happier life?

    The two steps to stop whining so much:

    1. Make it a priority to notice every time you complain or unnecessarily criticize. This includes judging others. Now, every time you catch yourself complaining, just stop and notice it.

    2. After you've noticed yourself complaining, ask yourself this: Is there anything I can do about what I'm complaining about, or it outside of my control? If there is something you can do about it, do it. If there is nothing you can do, let it go.

    Obviously, this is a little easier said than done. Complaining is an addiction and a hard habit to break. Like any other habit to break, it will take time.

    Even though it may be a long time (or possibly never) before you're living completely complaint-free, that's still okay. The good news is this isn't all-or-nothing. Even 10% less complaining will have an immediate positive impact on your life. Then, once you've decreased your whining by 10%, you can keep bootstrapping your way down to complaining less and less.

    After complaints show up less and less, something awesome starts to happen. Once your mind realizes that you won't tolerate its moaning, it will begin to give up its efforts. (Whatever you do, don't fall into the trap of complaining that you're complaining.)

    So the question is: Would you rather complain or be happy?

    (Oh and by the way, having gratitude is a great way to stop complaining.)

    如果我们真的想快乐,为什么我们不能像婴儿一样表现呢?

    我们设定一个又一个的目标,不断追逐功名利禄,在我们看来,这样的生活充满动力。然而,如果我们内心永不满足,这真的是充实的生活吗?

    你也许不这么认为,但看看自己在一天里有过多少这样那样的抱怨和不满吧。遇上交通堵塞、碰到坏天气、又或许是三明治里的芥末放少了,还有其他什么的,能让你找到不满理由的事情可是不胜枚举的。

    况且,你想抱怨的事情不光是那些户外的。我们也会对自己感到不满,总抱怨自己没有时间、没有金钱(这倒经常发生,因为通常这是"事实"),自己不够聪明、长得不够酷等等,这些就足够你抱怨的了。

    我清楚自己也曾有过这样的经历,因为自己无法控制而产生诸多抱怨。我从未细想过这些,直到我发现了一个关于"生活在无怨的世界中"的网站。

    设想一下,你只要停止抱怨,你的心情会变得多么好呢?多数抱怨是源于对外界事物无法控制。把精力用在你无法改变的事物上,是何等的情况呢?这可谓愚蠢之极,如果你要我回答的话。

    停止抱怨的第一步就是意识到你多么爱抱怨。一旦你明白你正在抱怨,那么停止然后仔细掂量这种情感。问问自己是抱怨苦恼好呢,还是心情愉快好?

    准备登上没有抱怨的开心之旅了吗?

    停止抱怨的两个步骤:

    1. 每当你开始抱怨或进行多余的批评的时候,你就要注意了。这其中也包括对他人评头论足。现在起,每次发现自己在抱怨时,立即停止并意识到这点。

    在意识到之后,问自己一个问题:我抱怨的事情是自己力所能及的还是能力之外的?如果可以解决,那么就采取行动,如果不能,那就静观其变吧。

    很显然,说起来容易做起来难。抱怨是一种很难改掉的习惯。和其他的习惯一样,改掉它要花时间。

    即使做到完全不抱怨要花上你很长一段时间,那也得做。幸运的是,这并不是"全有或全无"的事情。即使你改掉了一成的这个坏习惯,也会给我们生活带来积极的影响。然后,当你改掉到只剩一成的时候,就能让自己逐渐远离抱怨了。

    一旦你很少很少抱怨,一些奇妙的事情就会发生。可当你发现自己无法忍受对方咆哮的时候,这一切就会前功尽弃。(不管你做任何事情,千万不要落入抱怨的陷阱。)

    还是扪心自问:要抱怨还是要快乐?

    (顺便说一下,停止抱怨很好的一种方法就是心存感激)

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关键词: 婴儿 快乐 开心
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